A word to my trans fam

The state fears trans people—not just for who they are, but for what they represent: a radical rejection of imposed norms. Trans existence proves the world can be different, and that terrifies those in power.
That’s why they push fear, hoping to paralyze us. But fear isn’t the end—it’s the beginning. When we process fear instead of letting it consume us, we make room for what comes next: the strength of anger. In our sessions, we transform that anger into power using liberation-centered therapy that builds strength, direct action that disrupts oppression, and queer joy that refuses to be erased.
We are not passive recipients of oppression; we are architects of a world beyond it. Solidarity.

WHAT'S ACTUALLY HAPPENING IN SESSION:

A NOTE FOR PARENTS

Your child might not come home from therapy talking about "deep stuff." They might say they just played a video game or talked about random things. And if you're wondering, "Is this doing anything?" — you're not alone.

Here's what's actually happening beneath the surface:

1. This is Relational Work. Therapy for kids isn’t just about talking. It’s about building trust with an adult who doesn’t punish, push, or pretend. That trust becomes the foundation for real healing. If your child feels safe enough to just "hang out" with me, that’s not a waste of time. That’s progress.

2. The Relationship Is the Therapy. A lot of what I’m doing is modeling what it feels like to be around someone who’s calm, consistent, and curious. That experience matters more than any worksheet. It helps your child's nervous system begin to feel what safety, attunement, and respect actually feel like in real time.

3. Play is the Language. Kids process big feelings through movement, metaphor, and play. Games and conversation aren't distractions—they're doorways. Every interaction is a chance for me to track patterns, test regulation, and build repair. If a child opens up while playing, it’s not accidental. It’s because they feel safe.

4. We Move at the Speed of Trust. I don’t push disclosure or force vulnerability. That’s not therapeutic, it’s retraumatizing. If your child hasn’t "opened up" yet, it doesn’t mean they’re stuck. It means we’re still in the trust-building phase—which is essential to everything that comes next.

5. Not All Progress Looks Loud. Progress sometimes looks like a child smiling for the first time in weeks. Or asking if I’ll be there next time. Or relaxing their shoulders mid-game. These shifts are real. They tell me your child’s system is starting to believe that maybe, just maybe, they're safe.

You don’t have to track every headline to know something is shifting.
You feel it in your body. In your relationships. In your ability to rest.
This space isn’t for catching up on the news.
It’s for making sense of the signals you’re already carrying.
For building capacity in a time of slow-moving catastrophe.
For remembering what you still have power over—even as the world reshapes itself around you.
– Trauma-Informed Therapy
– Internal Family Systems (IFS) / Parts Work
– Narrative Therapy
– Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
– Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT)
– Somatic Awareness & Regulation
– Queer- and Trans-Affirming Therapy
– Systems & Identity-Based Approaches
– WPATH Letter Assessment (without gatekeeping)
You might not be able to name what’s happening, but you feel it tightening around you.
Your nervous system knows. Your relationships feel it. Your body’s tired of holding it all.
This is where you get to stop bracing.
Where you don’t have to justify how much it hurts.
Where you can unfreeze, grieve, question, and rewire—without needing to perform stability.
Where your clarity stops being a liability and starts becoming a tool.

About

Right now, my focus is making sure our trans kin have what they need to stay alive, sovereign, and unfucked with. If someone you know needs gender-affirming care—therapy, letters, connection, or just not feeling alone—reach out. We’ll get them to the right people. Safe clinicians. Real community. The Questing Queers is one place to start.

If you’re trying to reach me and I haven’t responded, don’t take the silence personally—take it as a nudge to try again. I’m in the work, but I’m not unreachable. I’m not too busy for you. Keep knocking. Solidarity isn’t just a word—I mean it.

Proud of my client created art in the office ^^

If you’re looking for something a little different—but still grounded, affirming, and real—reach out to Summer Elliott, LMFT. She’s the kind of therapist who holds space without flinching. You’ll be in good hands.
Summer Elliott LMFT
Contact info:
Summer@SummerElliottCounseling.com
Phone: 319-349-8077
Summer Elliott’s PsychologyToday Profile

Click here for Summer’s profile

Waterloo march and rally to stand with our community and defend LGBTQ+ rights - March 8, 2023

PROTECTING TRANS KIDS IS OUR ETHICAL RESPONSIBILITY

September 18th 2023, Iowa started forcing trans and non-binary youth to de-transition. This policy goes against the entire spirit of social work. It is not ok.

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